I hereby take it back, that “blasted” in-service was worth it. Not so much for what I learned about my job (I stand by the statement that I do it RIGHT, they don’t need to explain old stuff to me) but because I learned a few tricks that will help my admin and office manager, so knowing it and passing it on will let me keep the title of resident miracle worker. We do have a computer guy on site, but as he can’t be convinced to speak English when asked a computer question, he isn’t much help on the little stuff.
He speaks anime, though, so I forgive him all. It’s especially funny as I heard of Weiss Kreuz before I saw it, and asked him, and he dismissed it as “bishounen.” Which means beautiful man. Hmm, thought I. I like beautiful men…
Let’s see, what else. 2,668 viewings on the fanfic, and another review, wherein my story is described as “perfect.” Whoohoo! On to the eventually-paying stuff…
10,882 words on Keen. And I’m getting a better idea of where I’m going. Though there’s a patch I’m sure I’ll need to seriously edit, I have been able to just go around it for now, as I’m not sure what to do with it. I’m thrilled that I’m able to do that!
Keeping with the idea of a little how-to for beginners, I think I’ll expand on that. Possibly the hardest thing for a writer, any writer, though I’m only going from the folks I know, is to get past the inner weasel to get anything down at all. If you’ve ever tried much of anything, I’m betting you know the inner weasel, even if you don’t know the name.
Your inner weasel is that little voice that says it’s crap, don’t write that, no, you can’t go on, fix that sentence first, if you can’t write one decent paragraph why are you even trying this? Go dig a ditch for God’s sake, that’s all you’re good for. (not that ditch-digging isn’t a perfectly honorable and probably highly technical career nowadays, but that is the saying.)
So. We have the will to write, but we also have the weasel saying it’s not good enough. How to get past that damn weasel? Well, there are ways. One good one is to toss a dangling participle on the train tracks. This, of course, requires a knowledge of the freight schedule and a good sense of how long it takes that bugger to chase after such things…
Yeah, I like that one. But other ways abound, and the secret is to find what works for you. Just like hiccup cures, there is no one-size-fits-all solution. But I’ll gladly throw out a few of mine, and hope I’m not repeating myself. Though this bears repeating.
Try a silly font. I can caper on and run about and goof off all day, because obviously it isn’t for anyone but me if it’s not in a serious font. (Times New Roman, what this blog is usually in, is my ‘serious’ font. Courier is ugly.) And in my babbling is sure to be some seriously good stuff. Once I think there’s enough of it, I’ll sort out what’s worth keeping, transport it, transform it, and tell my weasel to go play in traffic, I must be good if I wrote all that.
Free-write. Just babble. Go. No censorship permitted. “Okay, I need Keen in the bathroom while Luc is doing this, but I just had Keen take a shower, wouldn’t he have–oh, hell, what is that noise, how am I supposed to concentrate–ooh, ooh, make a note, Keen hates that sound, it reminds him of–oh, hey, if he goes in the bathroom because he heard something outside, and he doesn’t know what it is, then Luc–” You get the idea. I have pages and pages of this. You should have seen it before my muses got more concentrated. I think I posted it once, actually. Maybe I’ll post it again, it makes me laugh my butt off to read that stuff…
Try a different format. Seriously different, I mean. If you usually write on the computer, take a pen and a piece of paper or three (you do remember what a pen is, right?) and go curl up in your couch or go to the park or something. I seem to get things going in fast food restaurants for some reason. Sit me down for an hour with a diet Coke and nowhere I have to be, and I’ll walk out with three or four scribbled pages of plot and notes and actual words, sometimes for more than one story.
Try writing a fanfic. Having problems with that certain something, ie POV switches or verb tense or consistent work habits? (POV switches, hmm. Who does that remind me of?) Try writing a fanfic. The characters are already there, there’s a built-in audience if you find the right place, and if you look, you’ll probably be able to find beta readers ready, willing and able to help you figure things out. Don’t look down on fanfic writers because “if they could really write they’d do it for money.” Maybe they just never found their way around the weasel without writing fanfics! Maybe there are some pros out there, writing fanfics just for the joy of it. Maybe there are more folks like me, figuring it out as they go along, but they’ve already got the hang of what you need help with. And maybe the fact that you don’t own the characters and it can never, ever be sold, will free you enough to get around your weasel right there.
http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/69697/1 This will get you to MediaMiner, where if you find my fic, good for you. Remember I wrote it for the fans, heed the warnings, and don’t you dare flame me if it bothers you. Unless you want to be held up for a public mocking in the forums, anyway. (This link goes to a Gatchaman fic, not mine, but very short and funny if you’ve ever seen the show. If you read it, review, it’s only polite.)
Put your character in your situations. This might help if you don’t know your people as well as you need to. Write a situation you know well, so your creativity can all go into the character. How would your hero react to that annoying wench you had to deal with today? How would he de-stress after, or would he just get more irritable as the day went on? I knew someone who put her characters on the Oprah Winfrey show. As in, “Vampires and the Slayers Who Love Them” featuring Buffy and Spike. (Just an example, never watched a whole show, but that’s what popped into my head.) This was useful to her, as she’d watched enough Oprah to know how to write it.
Wow, is this thing long enough yet? Maybe I’ll get into more ideas next time, and maybe I won’t. Right now I’m going to go see if I can get my weasel to chase bad noun/verb agreement off the roof.